Team America (World Police) is perhaps the perfect movie for an English audience. Principally for the opening scene that features a bunch of gung-ho Americans blowing the heck out of Paris by mistake. Its rare that I hear an entire theatre laughing - the only other time was all the way through Armageddon; but I don't think the humour was intentional in that particular crime against celluloid.
Since the following day was a First-Born day, I had to get the movie's theme tune ("America, Fuck Yeah!") out of my system by singing it en-route to the car. Substituting the word "America" for "Basingstoke" (the town in which I was staying) didn't help with the stickiness of the song, but made us giggle like cheeky monkeys.
I should explain; Basingstoke is one of those tremendously dull 'new' towns. It has a new indoor shopping centre that takes the word 'bland' to a whole new level - just walking through it can drain a person of their life-force. Additionally, it is famous for two things: The first is that if you travel west you have to go as far as New York before you'll find a taller building. The other is that the town has been immortalised in a joke involving the Queen, foxes and a really bad pun.
Basingstoke is also the home of a good chum, who's hospitality (and impressive audio-visual set-up) I've been known to abuse on many occasions. This time was a little different; generally I've made my way through a veritable tower of beer cans by the end of the evening. This time I was on the wagon. I was intrigued to see if my ability to talk utter tosh would be impaired.
The speculation that the reason why the hobbits kept changing size in the Lord Of The Rings was due to hobbits being made of erectile tissue proved that this wasn't the case. "Givvus a rub, Master Frodo, so oi can reach the cookie jar." It explains the hairy hands and feet too...
